Today was the day we met with Camhs for the follow up appointment with Elizabeth. We officially have a daughter diagnosed with autistic spectrum disorder, Aspergers. 15 months after we started our journey.
I’d had a meeting with them a couple of weeks ago so I did know the diagnosis already, but I’d asked that they talk to her with me as she is completely in denial about it all, and thinks it is in my head. If I’m truly honest getting the official diagnosis hit me hard, although I’ve thought it for years being told it for absolutely sure was upsetting. I truly hope at some point she realises that the whole process we’ve gone through is out of love for her, wanting to help other people understand her and at times our family dynamics. Why she behaves as she does in certain situations and why I react in certain situations that may seem harsh or bossy, or nit picking. Generally at these times I can see something brewing and I’m trying to get on top of her reactions or behaviour before it gets out of hand. This happened fairly recently when we went out with friends and another couple of friends that Lizzi hasn’t been out with before. To me she was clearly stressed, she was fidgety, and was fiddling constantly with things on the table, stealing food off our plates, and hiding into the wall. I worried for weeks after what these friends would think of her behaviour. I now realise that our true friends understand. That if anyone has a problem then it’s their problem.
So moveing forward I’ve been advised to write a Lizzi Manual by a close friend and suggest anyone going through any sort of diagnostic journey does the same. Write down any quirks and times you have to give extra support, things that they won’t or can’t do. As this will help in the future. Particularly if you need to talk to health care professionals. There are things I know happened in the past but can’t rememebr exactly when. If I’d wrote them down it would have been easier.
She is also going to be having some assessments in the future looking at ADD, but I think they are just covering all bases and making sure they haven’t missed anything.
Having Asd doesn’t change Elizabeth but it should change how we understand her and how we look after her in some situations (I do understand that she’s still a hobby teenager too)
I love her with all my heart.